We have enjoyed all the mushy, lovey happy Mother’s Day hugs and kisses, at least I got a flower (I am a mother by profession) and my mothers got way more than that. This is exactly why this post is coming in like a thief at night or joy in the morning, depending on how you read it.
Teaching has exposed me to different mothers and motherhood. I hear a lot of stories, witness some and observe the rest. Every time these stories are repeated I get stuck with lots of questions, ‘What happened to the motherhood of yesterday?’ I mean the days of my mother, ‘What happened to mothers who had time for their children?’, What happened to mothers who have updated files of their children and even 10 backup files?’, ‘What happened to mothers who could keep a home and even teach their children how to do the same?’, ‘What happened to mothers who knew the names of all their children’s friends, teachers, practically every living thing around their children?’ ‘What happened to the motherhood of yesterday? Did the deep blue ocean of the ‘21st’ century sweep it away? These questions keep flooding my mind and every time I search for an answer, I end up like empty sea shells at the seaside.
I will share one scenario with you, my friends. This particular scene is the least of all the alarming events that I have witnessed. I won’t paint a full portrait, just a highlight ( a girl gotta save her head). Here is a beautiful mother who came to pick her child up after school hours, her lovely daughter was so happy to see her mother and maybe more excited to go home and dive into chocolate eating or cartoon binging - Kids are mysterious (laughs). The little angel was all packed and ready to leave, then her mum asked a ‘sounds so caring question’ that almost made my eyes pop and my little caring heart run. She asked, ‘Did you take a lunch bag to school today?’ The child said, ‘No’ her mum said, ‘okay’ and they both left. Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, my dear friends, the lunch bag is still sitting pretty in the classroom till date. She had no idea if her daughter took a lunch box to school or not, and neither did she realize her child’s lunch bag has been missing.
Motherhood is so sacred that we can’t allow ANYTHING defile it. CAREER should not separate us from our children. I was burdened as to how to get this message across to the Mothers in my school, so I wrote a spoken word, that 6 talented children presented at the Mother’s Day Event held at my workplace. I strongly believed each mother left that day feeling the same burden in the hearts of the children.
To further strengthen the message, I decided to share the same burden with you my friends (definitely not to clear the cobwebs in my Substack dashboard). I hope this gets to a Mother. Let’s do our best to bring back Mother’s Day of YESTERDAY into TODAY (if you know what I mean, then you read my message well)
Find attached below the Spoken word write up
A letter to My Mother
I should write a letter to the woman who loved me when I was without form. To the woman who loved me long before I could form letters, long before I could say – MAMA, even if I end up saying PAPA first, she still loves me. To the woman that held my heart long before she could hold my hands. It was love at first sight right there at the hospital bedside. To the woman who despite my form, she only sees her baby whom she carried from weakness to weakness for 9 months. One day, one month isn’t long enough to write my letter to this woman – my mother.
I should write a letter to my mother
I should write a letter to the woman who watched me crawl, walk and run and no matter how fast I run, I can never run away from her sight (I used to think she had eyes everywhere). To the woman who spanks my butt so softly with lots of love in her sight. To the woman who became a nurse, warrior, driver, nutritionist, dentist, teacher, preacher, and watchman, everything and anything to watch me form in those little formation years.
I should write a letter to my mother.
I should write a letter to the woman that I never see cry, I should write a letter to the woman that I never see sleep, the heap of the things she needs to do never reduces. I should write a letter to the woman who mothers both the man and the child. I should write a letter to the woman that keeps tabs on me and even my friends (very protective). To the woman who would always be there for sure – oh Lord please make this sure!
I should write a letter to my mother.
I should write a letter to the woman to whom I told more secrets than my little diary with the lock. To the woman who protects and locks me away from danger.
Then we grew up.
I grew up and suddenly my diary seems to have more time to listen to me than my mother. I now compete for her love with another – her phone. “Are you fine?” is now replaced with “ssh! I am busy” I should write a letter still to my mother.
I should write a letter to my mother.
I should write a letter to the woman who now forgets what the cook made me eat for dinner. My tongue fails to remember what my mother’s food tasted like. To the woman who dropped her nurse, warrior, driver, nutritionist, dentist, teacher, preacher, and watchman, everything and anything skills to the Nanny. To the woman whom I barely see when I wake up and go to sleep. I suspect her new child is her work. To the woman who now forgets all my favorites.
I should write a letter to my mother.
I should write a letter to the woman who slowly and gradually sacrifices me at the altar of “everything she does, she does for me” To the woman who trades her time with me for money – I know you want me to be the best, so I need a private tutor, but you my mentor, don’t know how many subjects I bring home for homework. To the woman who only shows up at exams and tests, there is so much pressure! I need you all the time, let’s create leisure, please.
I should write a letter to my mother.
I should write a letter to my mother, to tell her I don’t want a face time or phone calls, I want a real “us time”
I should write a letter to my mother, to tell her I am not too big to hear those sweet words she tells me when I was little, not the calculated short words that drive pressure down my spine.
I should write a letter to my mother since we never get the time to talk like we used to.
I love you mother because I know all you do; you do for me.
it’s just that …
Your love language is too difficult for me to understand.
I celebrate you, mum.
You are still the best! Happy Mother’s Day.
Written by Maryjane Udeze
This was delightful to read.
Welldone The Real MJ 😍
Wonderful!